Post by Jack on May 30, 2009 23:50:37 GMT -5
My nose bleeds red and my face turns green,
But have to say my absolute favorite scene,
Was when Jack, acting like one of the biggest fools,
Gets hit by a flying box of tools.
But first we meet Jacob, who is full of magic,
He has a mortal enemy, which seems rather tragic,
To help every one of our Lostie friends is Jacob's wish,
And he knows how to cook a pretty mean fish.
When little Kate's in trouble, or Jack needs some candy,
Old Jacob always seems to be handy,
He was totally amazing as he even demonstrated,
He could be right on hand when Locke was defenestrated.
Off the island Jacob knows how to chill,
Or be right there when Nadia is turned into roadkill,
Seeing her get creamed was pretty rough,
But how does Jacob know all this stuff?
Meanwhile, after the computer graphics dub,
Sawyer and the girls escape from the sub,
We're not quite ready to write their epitaph,
Thanks to ABC for the advance scene telegraph. :-(
Finally we see Vincent, Bernard and Rose,
Sawyer was discovered thanks to Vincent's nose,
While somewhere else the bomb is getting wired,
We're supposed to believe -- WTF, Bernie and Rose are retired??
We don't need the whole bomb, only the core will suit,
What is it, a giant piece of fruit?
After Richard breaks through the wall,
Unfortunately for her, he makes Eloise take the fall.
Oh boy, I don't mean to pun,
But suddenly Roger is good with a gun?
As Sayid tries to duck behind a pole,
His stomach develops a large bloody hole.
They head out to the Swan, saved by the van,
Dude, Hurley's a mean VW-drivin' man,
Every time I have to see Radzinsky's head,
I realize I can't wait until he's dead.
I probably would prefer to pass,
On seeing Jack kick Sawyer's ass,
On Sawyer's face Jack continues to pound,
I sure wish it was the other way around.
Jack throws down the bomb and it lands with a thud,
But Jughead appears to be a colossal dud,
A magnetic core has the Dharma drill plucked,
And down the hole poor Juliet gets sucked.
And now the show really hurts my head,
I guess dead really is dead,
Wow, I sure had a shock,
To find out Locke is not Locke.
I can't believe what I just saw Ben do,
As blood from Jacob's mouth begins to spew,
The swelling grows in my brain,
As I realize I have to endure 8 and a half months of pain.
Juliet still seems to be alive,
How could anyone take that fall and survive?
She picks up a rock that the prop crew must have tossed,
And blows up the entire series of Lost!
Dear Damon and Carlton: now we must wait,
And for that I cannot describe the depths of my hate,
But I won't make too big a fuss,
As long as this summer you don't get hit by a bus.
